4:00 Sunday afternoon mass, Good Shepherd. With the kids gone for the day and nothing on the agenda, this past Sunday presented a perfect opportunity to take the time to hit one of the churches a bit farther away. I was surprised to find a 4:00 Sunday afternoon mass at Good Shepherd, so Mr. Wonderful and I put the pedal to the metal and headed to Montgomery. Touted as a "contemporary" mass, I never doubted for a minute that what I was going to find at Good Shepherd would be anything less than contemporary. I completely underestimated.
Good Shepherd is a huge parish. Lots of acreage, a sprawling physical campus, and an extremely large worship space - it has to be to accomodate the 11,000+ parishioners (4000+ households). When all of these parishioners actually attend mass, however, remains unclear. Granted, our visit was made on a pleasant Sunday summer afternoon, but attendance was noticeably low. I can only assume the remaining five weekend masses pick up the slack, but still, last week's collection as indicated in the bulletin doesn't seem in sync with the census numbers. With almost twice the number of households as St. Ignatius and, more than likely, a higher average income bracket, shouldn't the collection basket yield at least double the income? Apparently not. Interesting.
Everything at Good Shepherd is set at sharp, crisp right angles and not in a particularly attractive way, at least for my tastes. My husband and I passed through a pagoda-like entrance into a foyer that was more like the lobby of a movie theater. If there had been a concession stand, I wouldn't have looked twice. When we finally found the sanctuary, there was a pause, a brief moment of genuine disbelief. "What is this?" my husband asked. "I would say this is where Catholicism meets Protestantism," I replied.
I truly couldn't believe what I was seeing. In a room the shape of a right triangle, rows and rows and rows of what I call "waiting room chairs" faced the altar. There were no kneelers, of course, but here's the best part: high above the altar and on either side of the altar were - wait for it - The Big Screens, three of them to be exact. I fully expected to see Robert Schuller to come walking out. My husband later revealed that he was expecting Joel Osteen. I felt nauseous. I felt uneasy. Mass hadn't even started, and I wanted to leave. This was something I wasn't expecting at all, just as I wasn't expecting the slideshow of ever-so-meaningful pictures during mass or the jumbotron display of words to the songs. It was just so . . . so . . . tacky. Even My Husband the Heathen agreed, arguing that their efforts made everything so cheap, so theatrical - but without the theater. (For a brief moment, I almost countered with the argument that there really is no better theater than a man changing bread and wine into the body and blood of Christ, but this really wasn't the time.)
According to Good Shepherd's website, this particular mass is meant to "spread the word to those who have left the Church in order to find a more upbeat contemporary worship service elsewhere." Hmm. Like The Vineyard? I think they have upbeat "worship services." Last time I checked, I was still attending masses. "At Good Shepherd, you can clap or wave your hands to the music . . . in a lively worship space." Okay, I saw a few people clapping their hands but only one hand waver. Frankly, there just wasn't much at all that I would call lively. A clearly un-lively dimming of the lights for a musical reflection after communion came off as . . . well . . . hokey.
Unfortunately, I think the music group was a large part of the problem. I've heard wonderful contemporary performances time and time again by a group of high school and college students that far surpasses what I heard at Good Shepherd. There was something grating in their peformance. I'm not sure what the specific problem might have been - vocals? accompaniment? - but whatever it was was also compounded by a poor sound system. Overall, this "vibrant worship experience" was just trying too hard to be something it wasn't. This was not the Hour of Power.
Ironically, my husband and I had planned on stopping for dinner on the way home after mass. If we had been smart, we could have saved a few dollars had we taken advantage of Good Shepherd's monthly "Fellowship in the Front Foyer" held on the day we visited. This month, the event had a colorful "beach" theme. Dedicated parishioners were serving sloppy joes, fruit kabobs, salt water taffy, and drinks to anyone ready to eat. A craft project that involved decorating flip-flops was offered to the kids. My Husband the Heathen snagged a large cookie on the way out. I didn't have the heart to tell him he had missed the Coronas chilling in a large tub of ice . . . and what surely would have been another moment of disbelief.
ATTENDANCE: Less than half full
DURATION: One hour
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